So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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