there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I've blown a few things in my day
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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