You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
