I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
