you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
i think im in europe. pls send help
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
