Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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