Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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