it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
