It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
The beer is more important than you right now.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize