I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
