I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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