did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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