I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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