? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize