With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
