we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
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