i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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