And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
