if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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