Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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