i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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