If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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