remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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