I wanna bring you to show and tell
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
