i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
