fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Randomize
