i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
