At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
