at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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