I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
