so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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