i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
no, he came in my armpit
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
