omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
