he shaved USA in his pubs
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
