First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
