Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
