Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
this just has baby written all over it
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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