plz talk dirty to me
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
