But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize