Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
