After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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