No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
