She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
