She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
