i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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