Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
