Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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