Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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