i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
