Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
im holly from the hills drunk
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
