He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
