I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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